Ombliboo Tombliboo, That's How It Goes
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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "melissaria" journal:
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I am moving|
I have given my last post some consideration, and I'm off to Blogger to try and create something with a bit more, I don't know - perhaps just a bit less introspection.
No, It's Not Just You
Blogger seems to make it a little easier for techno-numpties like myself to create something that looks a little more like I know what I'm doing. I clearly don't and I'm fucked if I can get the Technorati tagcloud to work (I WANT a tagcloud, dammit), but I like the look of what I've manage to put together in a couple of days, rather than the three years it's taken me to get this far here.
I'll be back no doubt, when I have something to say that I'd rather keep a bit more private or can't be arsed to write properly. In the meantime, details of everything that's currently pissing me off (actually, that's not true, I'd be typing 24/7) can be found here:
No, It's Not Just You
The price of milk|
I had a letter this morning from the very large organisation that employs my milkman saying that the price of milk is going up. Amongst the usual platitudinous CRM-based nonsense was this paragraph:
"The main reason for this increase is a world shortage of milk, which is affecting the price of all milk and dairy products. This comes at a time when the British dairy industry is also experiencing significant change. The soaring cost of animal feed and poor weather over the summer has led to lower amounts of milk being produced and some real difficulties for many of our farmers."
Oh come off it. I'm no investigative journalist, and I don't have the time to present a watertight case here, but this smells of something else to me. It's been several years since we first started hearing that UK dairy farmers were going out of business at an alarming rate due to the aggressive purchasing tactics of the major retailers. More recently we've heard the allegations of price-fixing of milk and cheese. And now we're short of milk, and it's going to cost us more money.
Did no-one else see this coming? I predict that it's time to start looking very hard at our budgets and what we consider important. I have a feeling that our current fixation with cheap commodities is going to prove itself unsustainable and consumers are going to get a good hard bite in the arse in the next few years. Milk is only the start.
Tags: bastards, consumerism, milk, supermarkets
To blog or not to blog...?|
The last comment had me thinking. Yes it's all very well keeping a blog for my own personal entertainment, but should I be thinking about doing a little bit more with it? Deliberately going after readers, making it look like someone owns it - really getting involved in the blogosphere, that sort of thing.
I don't know. It's all very well talking like this when I'm really up, feeling creative and wanting to share, but there are several drawbacks:
1. Self-censorship. If I knew I were writing for an audience, I think I'd struggle to just let things flow. Why would I want to bother worrying about what my readers might think? At the moment, if people don't like what I write, then they can just fuck off. It's easy that way and makes no difference to me. If I were to be concerned with how many people had 'friended' me, or how many comments I received, then my blog wouldn't be the useful outlet for maintaining my sanity that it currently is. And I would worry about those things because I'm just a little bit obsessive by nature.
2. Technophobia. I'm not good with blog technology. I don't know how to customize sites and do all the little bits and bobs that make blogs look like you might want to stop and read them. And I don't have time to learn. Which leads neatly onto...
3. Time. I don't have enough to spare. If I were to take this on properly, I'd need to do it regularly or people would just stop bothering to look. Which would make all the extra effort a bit pointless.
4. Motivation. As I said before, right now, I'm feeling creative and have self-esteem so high I can't see over it. But I suffer from depressive episodes that can have me going from thoroughly contented with everything that I am and have, to crying into my gin about being and arsehole and a failure in a matter of minutes. That's not good for regular posting, and the last thing the world needs is yet another 'Self-disclosures of an Occasional Depressive' blog.
5. Self-publicity. How do you actually go about getting noticed? I only read 2 blogs regularly and I'm not sure I'm in a position to take the routes to the popularity they have achieved. I can try and write something so hilarious it ends up getting widely circulated round the office emails (a la 'Cleaning the Fucking Kitchen For Dummies' - Fridgemagnet, 2001). But I don't think I could force or contrive that level of comic genius. I'm not a professional writer, and if I find something to grumble about that hits home with thousands then it would have to be a spontaneously inspired piece. The other blogger (Woman of Experience) is a professional writer and her blog got noticed by the Times. But she is good, really really, consistently, professionally good - something to aspire to, rather than try and emulate tomorrow.
6. Comments. I haven't time for idiots and trolls, and think that they might spoil my fun if they started popping up here. I'd have to ban them. Which leads me to 'freedom of speech' considerations that I really don't have time to think out properly.
BUT - I do love to write, and I do love attention. Plus, I talk a lot of sense and everyone should be forced to listen to me!
Sigh. Who knows, On balance, and to quote Lionel Bart's Fagin - 'I think I'd better think it out again'
Any ideas or suggestions gratefully accepted from any lurkers out there, known or otherwise!
Current Mood: creative
Tags: blogging, creativity, what the fuck am i going to do next
Boreout - according to the Times, is the new must-have office disease. Kind of the opposite of burnout, but related to being under, rather than over-challenged. Scarily, I answered the questions as though I were still in my last proper 'employed' role (the one in Basildon), and answered yes to ALL 10 QUESTIONS. No wonder I went a little bit mental.
I must think of something new and interesting to do before it is time to start earning again. Yes I was good at admin but it was a serious underachievement and it sure as hell wasn't good for me.
If you say “yes” to four or more of these, you could have boreout . . .
1 Do you complete private tasks at work?
2 Do you feel underchallenged or bored?
3 Do you sometimes pretend to be busy?
4 Are you tired and apathetic after work even though you experienced no stress in the office?
5 Are you unhappy with your work?
6 Do you find your work meaningless?
7 Could you complete your work quicker than you are doing?
8 Are you afraid of changing your job because you might take a salary cut?
9 Do you send private e-mails to colleagues during working hours?
10 Do you have little or no interest in your work?
Current Mood: blah
Tags: boring, what the fuck am i going to do next, work
Other stuff for today...|
On glancing at the tabloid headlines today, I was surprised to find myself most impressed with The Sun. All the usual dreadful rags were running with headlines about the 'proof' that Madeleine McCann died of a sleeping pill overdose at the hands of their evil parents, whereas The Sun seemed to be taking the view that perhaps we should, you know, leave the poor fuckers alone, and let the justice system do its job. It was just a cursory glance, and I could be way off the mark, but that was how it seemed.
And I want to know why the Daily Express (fucking vile, hateful, too crap even to wipe my arse with rag) felt the need for the inverted commas around the word 'proof'. What is 'proof'? Either it's proof, or it isn't - is 'proof' meant to be some halfway house which might enable them to say 'oops, no we were wrong but hey, look we weren't REALLY persecuting these people based on speculation and no evidence whatsoever, look, we used inverted commas and only said 'proof'. Wankers.
The porn TV has gone from behind the house. Have they realised by themselves, or has my readership extended beyond my hubby and someone I know who stumbled across me randomly (and I'd quite like to know HOW?!)
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: curious
Tags: filthy rags, madeleine mccann
Women can be a bit shit sometimes.|
As evidence to support the above statement, I give you this blog entry from the Times' Alpha Mummy blog. It's called 'I hate Yummy Mummies' and you probably don't even need to read it,
I'm just keeping it for posterity because I'm quite proud of my own comment there which I will no doubt refer to and rehash many times throughout the rest of my life.
Seriously though, I don't get why women, and mothers in particular have to be so bitchy about their differences. Actually, I do in a sort of anthropological, competitive kind of way, but I do think we should be able to rise above all that now. Especially online, where you are least likely to be face to face with someone who might be trying to steal your mate.
There are tough calls to be made from the very start of this journey, and all we can do is to muddle through to the very best of our ability, make the decisions we think our best for our families, and decide to stand firm in the face of the inevitable criticism we will all face. C-section/Homebirth, Breast/Bottle, Cottons/Disposables, Attachment Parenting/Gina Ford, Back-to-Work/Stay-at-Home, Nursery/Family - there are opposite ways of doing things everywhere we look. Just because another mum is doing something different doesn't make them wrong, and doesn't give us the right to scratch their virtual eyes out across the ether. And vice versa. We should not feel mortally wounded if someone takes a cheap shot at a method or point of view we may hold dear.
Nor should we tread as though on eggshells around some of the favourite hot topics when we know very well that all the scientific research done to date points in one direction; for example breastfeeding IS the very best start for a baby, and you really SHOULD give your child the MMR vaccination. And if we decide to take the opposite view, then we should expect to be challenged, and deal with those challenges with reason and with good grace, not with cheap personal insults or stereotypes.
Let's face it, 99% of us are probably a bit baggier, flabbier and not as much fun as we were before. We're all utterly bollocksed from interrupted sleep, from keeping on top of our workloads (domestic and/or professional), from negotiating the dividion of labour for evenings and weekends when 'HE' is at home, keeping our offspring fed, clothed and entertained, and possibly even from trying to fit in a little bit of time for ourselves. We probably all fantasise a little about life on the other side of the fence (be it having an afternoon to prepare a gorgeous, nutritious meal, and have the house spotless for the weekend, or shining in a meeting, going out for lunch, getting to eat it with a knife AND fork, enjoying witty office banter and Friday drinks), and I'm certain that not many of us are having very much sex these days. What i'm trying to say is, we're all in the same boat here girl's let's stop flinging the shit and start pulling together and it could all be so much more fun.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: creative
Tags: bitching, motherhood, women
Free porn, wasted.|
I wonder if the neighbours with the 42" TV and no curtains who live over my back fence know that whatever they watch is completely visible from my study?
They watch a lot of football, snooker, Big Brother, and porn. It's such a shame, because I believe that genuine free porn is quite hard to come by (no pun intended), and it's wasted on me as I hate the stuff. See previous comments about Ann Widdecombe...although I'm watching her new series and going right off her. DO admire her front though.
The same neighbours also seem to have an obsession with building things out of wood. Big things too - there are always huge planks, palettes etc being delivered and lying around the place. It's all a bit odd.
Become very addicted to facebook recently. Not so sure why I keep going back as I really can't be arsed with all the casting of Harry Potter spells and throwing of imaginary drinks and silly shit that goes with it, but it is keeping me entertained!
Current Mood: thoughtful
I'm not a gambler at all, but tonight I had a bit of a flash of something that almost had me scuttling down the bookies with £20, wonder what odds I would get?
Richard Dawkins to become a born-again Christian,
C's already offered me 1000-1 - but oh how I would laugh.
Current Mood: curious
Give Peas a Chance|
Normally, I detest viral marketing of this kind, but I've had too much wine, my normal defences are down, and I really truly do love peas.
I'm not entirely sure what a 'onesie' is - is that American for 'babygro'? But I want one. And I am a scrounging cheapskate. SO here's the link...
I'm a tragic demographic|
I know this because the evil advertising and marketing bastards know exactly what TV channels and programmes I watch, and target me with remarkable accuracy. This clearly makes me a typical sad, thirty-something stay at home mum on a bandwagon. All my regular music channels and TV programmes are interspersed with ads for nappies, cleaning products and garden furniture. Even fucking Q and MTV2, the only channels that play music that I like - and which I have now gone right off.
I can now tell if I am watching a programme aimed further up the social rankings than me (whatever they may be these days) because I will see ads for conservatories, good mortgages, Mercedes and financial products and services for investors. It means I'm likely to learn something from the programme instead of simply being entertained by it. Once I start to see ads for no-refusal car credit, debt consolidation services and sub-Hello gossip mags (Pick Me Up, Closer, etc...), then I know I'm slumming it - probably watching Big Brother, and it's time to do something else.
Even the bastard supermarkets know why I've not loved them so much recently and have changed their ads accordingly. Let's all look at our happy, smiling suppliers and how our milk could have come fresh from the cow within the past hour. Actually, the fuckers seem to have several types of ad on the go - happy local smiling cows for certain programmes, and big price cuts for others. I'm not fooled, I hope!
I try so hard to not follow the herd, I really do, but clearly there is more to it than I thought!
I think the boy has chicken pox. Poor little bugger, all scabs and scratching, not nice.
Current Mood: tired
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